The following is a transcript of a telephone conversation I had with my mother yesterday. And when I say “transcript”, I mean “based loosely on my memory of the actual conversation, with my Mom’s sillier comments emphasized.”
Me: So, I’m pretty excited. I got Pixies tickets for Dec. 1. Three whole days before they go on sale at the box office!
Ma Smash: Oh! Pixies tickets! That’s great. (Pause.) Who are the Pixies?
Me: The Pixies are the greatest band in the whole world. They’re like our Beatles. Only there’s a chick.
Ma Smash: I thought the Dixie Chicks were the greatest band in the world.
Me: (Laughing.)
Ma Smash: Aren’t the Dixie Chicks your favorite band?
Me: Wait. You’re kidding, right? Tell me you’re kidding.
Ma Smash: No! You’re always talking about them.
Me: The Dixie Chicks? ARE YOU SERIOUS? They’re … like, pop/country. They play arenas.
Ma Smash: Well, who are you always talking about then? La, la, la, greatest band ever, la, la, la, Amanda whatshername…
Me: Amanda Palmer? Do you mean the Dresden Dolls?
Ma Smash: That’s it! The Dresden Dolls.
Me: Oh, Mom. Mom. That’s … so wrong.
Jennie Smash 
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